Scenario: You have a friend. Maybe you've just met. Maybe you've known her for a long time. Either way, she trusts you, and you care about her. One night--maybe it's the alcohol, maybe it's that she's tired of waiting for his calls--she opens up to you. She tells you a story so heartbreaking, that your tears flow just as freely as hers. Her boyfriend hits her. He's put her in the hospital. He's left her by the side of the road with no money for a bus home. He dictates who she talks to and when. She's been cut off from her friends. It's making her sick. Maybe you know the guy--maybe he even seems like a perfect gentleman--or maybe you don't, but you've never even seen a hint of what she's telling you before tonight. Looking into her tear-stained face, you know why she's telling you. She's worried if she doesn't get away now, he will kill her. And you know it too. So together, you make a plan. You engineer her escape. You tell her it's going to be hard, it's going to hurt, that she'll want to go back. She says she knows all this. She's ready. You turn off her phone, together you pack a bag, maybe you take her to a friend's house, maybe she stays with you, maybe you find a hotel. I'm helping her, you think. I can save this girl. She looks at you, grateful. Together, you feel strong.
And then, suddenly, just like flipping a switch, she changes her mind. Maybe it's the next day, maybe it's only an hour later. Maybe she's talked to him, heard his apologies. She wants to go back. She needs him. She tells you nothing she told you is true. He doesn't hit her, she says. They just fight sometimes. He's flawed, but she loves him. She wants her phone, she wants to go. Don't block her way. You look her in the eye. Tell me he's never hit you, you say. He's never hit me. Tell me he's never left you by the side of the road. Never. Put you in the hospital? Never. Told you who you can talk to? Never. I just wanted attention, she says. Thanks for your concern. Now let me leave.
